Desire
When I learned about marital sex, I was afraid. A lifetime of partnership hindered by moments of discomfort and disgust. I knew it was expected of both individuals. I knew I would be expected to submit. I figured if I could survive the wedding night, the rest of the years…
Blood Draws
I’ve never enjoyed blood draws. The idea of something piercing through your skin and stabbing into a vein supposedly protected makes my head spin and my stomach drop. It’s hard for me to lay still when I know what’s coming. The jab, the bite, the horrible, sinking feeling as my…
On Anger
Two days ago, my mother asked me if I thought I was aggressive when I stepped away from a man who invaded my personal space. I said yes, I probably had been, but if he was a good man he would understand I was uncomfortable. She said she worried she…
Remember what’s important
My mom says you remember what’s important to you. Whenever I would forget to do chores, or forget homework, she would remind me to find these tasks important so I would remember to do them. I did my best. I committed schedules to my mind, repeating them relentlessly so I…
Choices and Rings
When I was a suicidal teenager, I was forced to attend church camp. I travelled up in a van with my uncle, my soon-to-be aunt, and several other couples. Two of the other girls had promise rings. They were simple, a silver band with a few jewels inlaid in it,…