Written script my friend and I planed to do for May 4th. Her character: Darra, all rights to that character is her’s. Jade is my character, which means I will cut you if you steal her. (If you survive her before I get to you.) Star Wars goes to it’s owner(s?): Disney (right?) and Lucas Arts. And yes. We did choreograph the fight at the end. We jumped over each other’s lightsabers, slammed lightsabers out of each other’s hands, and nearly killed each other. It was bloody fun.

[Enter Jade and Darra. BOTH are walking towards one another, accidentally brush into each other. BOTH step a few more steps then pause and turn around to face each other. At first there is silence, before BOTH speak up.]

BOTH: Excuse you.

JADE: Excuse me? Excuse you, you bloody gizak.

DARRA: I’m sorry, didn’t quite hear what you said.

JADE: You didn’t? Oh, dear, I do hope you aren’t going deaf.

DARRA: That would be a shame, wouldn’t it? I think someone owes me an apology.

JADE: Wonder who that could be. Wouldn’t be me, however, for I think someone owes me an apology.

DARRA: Oh, I don’t think so.

JADE: You don’t? See, only a guilty person says that.

DARRA: Only a fool demands an apology when the fault is there’s.

JADE: Really? I never demanded anything. You’re the one placing blame. Something plaguing your conscious?

DARRA: Mine’s perfectly clear. I only place blame when blame is deserved.

JADE: Is that so, gizak? It seems you’ve fallen short in your judgment.

DARRA: Wampas always were stupid.

JADE: And hssisses always avoided rightful blame.

DARRA: Speak for yourself.

JADE: Lost for words?

DARRA: Of course not, hutt-spawn.

JADE: I’m sorry, schutta, I didn’t hear you. Mind repeating that?

DARRA: As you wish. Hut. Spawn.

JADE: I’m sorry, E Chu Ta, you seem to be referring to some other laserbrain than me. Maybe you’re lashing out with all the things you’ve heard yourself be called. Poor gizak.

DARRA:  Poor sculag, you’re so confused.

JADE: Excuse me, you Nerf Herder, for simply wanting you to apologize for rudely running into me! How bloody hard is it for you to apologize, gizak!?

DARRA: Chubba! You ran into me! Which is why your clumsy shebs should apologize to me!

JADE: Bloody lurdo! Why would I apologize to a sleemo like you?

DARRA: Shavit! I’m surprised your idiocy has gotten you this far in life, you’re so blaster-brained!

JADE: Excuse me for having a brain! At least I’m not some mindless schutta like you. Luckily for me, I still have a future!

DARRA: Scutta?!  E chu ta! At least I’m not ugly.

JADE: Ugly? You clearly haven’t looked in a mirror. Ever.

DARRA: Neither have you, slimy dianoga.

BOTH: [pause. Then, shouting.] YOU BLURRG!

[BOTH glare angrily and reach for their lightsabers. They attack]

[FIRST: lightsaber clash, JADE is kicked in the stomach, she then goes to attack, DARRA grabs wrist, throws lightsaber aside, JADE pulls out third lightsaber, DARRA grabs her discarded one. Circle. Then attack, spin away, attack, JADE jumps attack, DARRA ducks while slicing for legs. Then DARRA goes for the legs, JADE jumps over , JADE flips around and goes for the back, DARRA blocks behind her back, throws JADE off. KNIFE FIGHT. Block twice, JADE’S arms get crossed, throws DARRA off, BOTH stab then slice for the stomach, BOTH move away then cut the other’s lightsaber. BOTH are now down to one. Switch lightsaber technique, hit, JADE kicks, DARRA goes back, BOTH attack again, DARRA jump kicks JADE. Circle. Attack, JADE goes with her free hand to the head, DARRA blocks, BOTH go to kick, hit knees, BOTH retreat in pain. BOTH use the Force then get thrown back. Go for a final end-all attack, stop inches away from the neck, step back, nod, walk off grumbling: May the Force be with you.]