We were kids together.<\/p>\n
I met him when I was young. I met him in school, around fourth grade. We were inseparable. People told me he had a crush on me, but I didn\u2019t listen. He was my best friend. I didn\u2019t care what other people thought.<\/p>\n
We sat together during free time in the back of the room, on the cold, hard, tiled floor, our backs against the plastic cabinets locked to keep us out. In my hands was the guide book to Pok\u00e9mon Sapphire and Ruby. In his hands was tracing paper.<\/p>\n
\u201cDo you want to go first?\u201d he asked me. I shook my head.<\/p>\n
\u201cNo, you can go first.\u201d I rip a piece of tracing paper and he turns away. I flip through the guide book to the end, where the Pok\u00e9mon are displayed. There, near the end of the book, is one of his favorite Pok\u00e9mon. I smile, position the piece of tracing paper over Latios\u2019s picture, grab my pencil, and begin to outline it.<\/p>\n
\u201cOkay,\u201d I say, folding the rest of the book under itself so he couldn\u2019t see the Pok\u00e9mon around it. He turns and his eyes focus on the lines I make as I bend over it, casting a shadow to be sure he can\u2019t just see through the paper. He frowns then, as I arch around Latos\u2019s wing, his face splits wide.<\/p>\n
\u201cLatios!\u201d<\/p>\n
I laugh, hand him the paper, pencil, and book, and he motions for me to turn around.<\/p>\n
\u201cThat was an easy one,\u201d he says to my back. I grin at the floor.<\/p>\n
\u201cNext time it will be harder.\u201d But it won\u2019t be, because we know every Pokemon\u2019s name, silhouette, and type like we know our own birthday. Other kids said it was silly to do our little game, but we didn\u2019t care. We didn\u2019t want to be popular, anyway. All we wanted was each other.<\/p>\n
Together, we were a team.<\/p>\n
We sat on the bus together, too. The long, yellow bus with the driver that we didn\u2019t like. She was mean and had glaring, narrowed eyes. We would sit together and curl up behind the other seat\u2019s shadow so she didn\u2019t see us. I would pull out my Gameboy Advanced\u2014in that aspect, I was<\/i> a cool kid. Everyone else still had only Color.<\/p>\n
In the handhold was Pokemon Crystal. I\u2019d boot it up and we would sit close together, with him looking over my shoulder. He couldn\u2019t bring his Gameboy to school and hide it in his backpack like me, after all. But he would watch me and congratulate me whenever I caught a new member for my team. I wasn\u2019t very good then.<\/p>\n
Sometimes I would get annoyed when he asked to play it. I told him no, because it was my<\/i> game, not his. I didn\u2019t want him to hurt any of my Pokemon. I didn\u2019t want him to make them faint and cause me to lose money. Who would want that, anyway? Losing game money is a pretty big deal, after all. So I would do this little trick with my Gameboy. You see, I could flick the power off button without it turning off. He would grunt and turn away towards the window, his arms crossed. Then I would turn away from him, risk being seen by the bus lady, and continue playing. I\u2019d hide it when he got off at his stop, which was before mine, of course.<\/p>\n
During recess we\u2019d play Pokemon together, acting out everything. I had a Blazekin, since I was a sucker for fire types, and he\u2019d have Mudswamp, a water type. Together we fought against Bad Guys and caught all the legendary pokemon\u2014though we did fight over Latios. We\u2019d run up and down the playground and battle each other. Sometimes we would become the pokemon ourselves\u2014that\u2019s when the battles got really heated. No one ever won, though. Neither of us wanted to admit defeat.<\/p>\n
When I was about seven, I sprained my ankle and fractured my growth plate. I had to come to school in a cast. That day, everyone was my friend and wrote on it, saying things like \u201cAmanda was here.\u201d I asked Matthew to write on it first. He couldn\u2019t at the moment, but wanted to be the first one anyway, so I refused to let anyone touch my cast with a pen until he had a chance to write on it. It was hard telling everyone no, but I did it.<\/p>\n
Because Matthew was my friend. And he asked me to do something and I promised. We never break promises.<\/p>\n
He kept pace with me during my time in the cast, since I wasn\u2019t allowed to run around much. He didn\u2019t like playing tag with everyone anyway, so he was happy to opt out of the game. We sat together and showed off Pokemon cards and played Pals together. The kind of imagination game that doesn\u2019t always involve running.<\/p>\n
Matthew was the only boy at my birthday party. I don\u2019t think he minded.<\/p>\n
When I got older, Mom stopped letting him spend the night. I had to do one birthday party without him, which was weird. No one wanted to talk about Pokemon with me. I thought it went pretty well, but it was hard telling Matt he couldn\u2019t come. I didn\u2019t understand why Mom wouldn\u2019t let him stay the night, but I couldn\u2019t argue. She was my Mom, after all.<\/p>\n
Eventually, we had to move. It was pretty hard. I didn\u2019t want to. I took pictures of my house so I would never forget it. I didn\u2019t like telling Matt we were leaving then, too. I didn\u2019t think I\u2019d see him again.<\/p>\n
It was years until we talked again. I lived in Portland, Oregon, and was struggling through 7th<\/sup> and 8th<\/sup> grade. I needed a friend.<\/p>\n It was Mom who told me. Matthew has cancer, she said. I paused and didn\u2019t say anything at first.<\/p>\n \u201cWhat kind of cancer?\u201d I said.<\/p>\n “Leukemia.”<\/p>\n \u201cOh.\u201d That\u2019s okay, I thought. He\u2019d be okay.<\/p>\n We talked over the phone one night. He had to be in a wheelchair.<\/p>\n \u201cThat\u2019s cool,\u201d I said.<\/p>\n \u201cYeah.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cHave you done anything fun?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cI went to a dance.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cOh.\u201d I didn\u2019t like dances.<\/p>\n \u201cYeah. It was kind of lame.\u201d<\/p>\n I laughed. I felt like crying. He didn\u2019t sound the same. He sounded older. He sounded weak.<\/p>\n \u201cAre you going to come down?\u201d he asked.<\/p>\n \u201cYeah.\u201d I said. \u201cI think so.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cYeah.\u201d he said. \u201cThat would be cool.\u201d<\/p>\n There was a pause. Then, remembering an old game of ours over the phone we used to play when we were younger, I grumbled:<\/p>\n \u201cDang it, Blazekin, don\u2019t catch the bed on fire!\u201d<\/p>\n I think he smiled.<\/p>\n Mom sat me down one day.<\/p>\n \u201cThe doctors said he only has until Christmas.\u201d<\/p>\n I didn\u2019t know what to say. I cried harder that night.<\/p>\n But Matthew proved them wrong. He lived. And he lived through the next date they put on his life, too. Until finally we were able to find a flight and I was flown down to see him. I stayed with a good friend of mine, Katelyn. I called her KK, since those were her initials.<\/p>\n It was fun for the first few days. We were going to see him on the third day, so I could get settled in. We hung out in her tree house and road four wheelers around. We even went to the national park not far away and drove around in there one day. We played video games together and laughed about friends.<\/p>\n Then the third day came. They drove me to Matt\u2019s house. I had never been inside before. I walked up the steps to the second floor. It was messy. Matt\u2019s Mom was on the couch. She said hello. Her eyes did not.<\/p>\n There was a nurse there, too. We were led to Matt. He was laying in his parent\u2019s room, I think, because I don\u2019t think Matt was allowed to have a T.V. in his room. He was watching Pokemon.<\/p>\n We sat down on stools by his bed and I smiled at the screen.<\/p>\n \u201cI just saw this episode a few days ago,\u201d I said. KK laughed.<\/p>\n \u201cYou two and your Pokemon.\u201d<\/p>\n I forced myself to look at him as he reached for the remote.\u00a0 I didn\u2019t want him to grab the remote, because I could see every one of his bones. I thought that the remote would snap his wrist in half. My heart sped up and my throat clogged. I was scared for him. Even the blankets looked like they were too heavy on him. He picked up the remote and turned the volume down. He looked at me with sunken eyes and smiled a little. He had a hat on and a little bit of hair poking out from under it. I talked to him like I would a child. I felt bad but I couldn\u2019t stop. He looked weaker than a baby who was trying to keep his head up.<\/p>\n Before we left I took a picture with him. They told me to get closer. I was scared I might crush him if I sat too close.<\/p>\n You couldn\u2019t see his eyes in the photo.<\/p>\n I saw him again before I left. He was sleeping on a mattress on the floor. I think they were trying to move him. Maybe for more Cemo. I\u2019m not sure.<\/p>\n The nurse was a plump woman and she had her hands over her mouth. She was trying to keep from crying. I was too stunned to cry. I knelt by his side. I looked at the nurse.<\/p>\n \u201cI don\u2019t know what to say.\u201d I almost laughed. It was such a clich\u00e9 thing to say. How silly for me to be at a loss for words. She smiled a little, like maybe she thought it was clich\u00e9, too.<\/p>\n \u201cJust tell him you love him and kiss him on the cheek.\u201d she said between her fingers. Her eyes were filling with tears. She blinked a few times to make them go away.<\/p>\n I leaned over Matt\u2019s bed and kissed his cheek. It was cold like stone. I felt his bones under my lips.<\/p>\n \u201cI love you, Matt.\u201d I whispered, like it was a secret only he was to know. The woman smiled at me between her fingers as I stood and walked towards her. I tried my best not to cry, but I knew she could see my eyes fill with water.<\/p>\n \u201cYou didn\u2019t have to do that, you know,\u201d she said, her voice suddenly guilty. I smile.<\/p>\n \u201cI know.\u201d<\/p>\n I left California not long after that. I didn\u2019t know exactly what to say to anyone. I came home. A week passed and I was starting to meld back into normal life. Mom sat me down.<\/p>\n \u201cIt\u2019s about Matthew.\u201d she said, her back against the brown fabric couch, her hands in her lap. I stood there a moment. My heart leapt.<\/p>\n He was healed! There was no other explanation!<\/p>\n I jumped onto the couch next to her and smiled. I couldn\u2019t open my mouth to say, \u201cWhat is the good news\u201d before she opened her’s.<\/p>\n \u201cMatthew\u2019s dead.\u201d<\/p>\n I didn\u2019t cry at first. At first I thought she was kidding. Some cruel joke that she would laugh at then scream, \u201cNo! I\u2019m kidding, he\u2019s all right!\u201d<\/p>\n She didn\u2019t. She looked at me hard. I stared at her shirt.<\/p>\n Then I cried for hours.<\/p>\n I couldn\u2019t go to his funeral, but we sent flowers and I sent a letter. My friend KK was able to attend. She told me it was beautiful. I didn\u2019t want her to tell me anymore.<\/p>\n In class I stood before the bell. A girl named Lauren turned to me.<\/p>\n \u201cAre you okay?\u201d she asked. I looked at her. She was showing me the first kindness in years.<\/p>\n \u201cMy friend passed away not long ago.\u201d I said. I kept myself from crying.<\/p>\n Lauren turned away.<\/p>\n \u201cOh.\u201d She didn\u2019t speak to me for weeks after that.<\/p>\n October 12, 2013, the new Pokemon game came out. I booted it up with my brother at my side.<\/p>\n Matthew would be amazed at how far we\u2019ve come. <\/i>I thought. From pixels to 3D.<\/i> I play through the game and gather his favorite pokemon.<\/p>\n I name them Matthew.<\/p>\n I send them to people over the internet.<\/p>\n Your name will always live on.<\/i><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" We were kids together. I met him when I was young. I met him in school, around fourth grade. We were inseparable. People told me he had a crush on me, but I didn\u2019t listen. He was my best friend. I didn\u2019t care what other people thought. We sat together…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_is_tweetstorm":false,"jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":[]},"categories":[5],"tags":[26,72,129,130,16,19,12,68,92,69,114,60,97,37],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/s27tjX-kids","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/winter-publishing.com\/welcome-to-winter\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/664"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/winter-publishing.com\/welcome-to-winter\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/winter-publishing.com\/welcome-to-winter\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/winter-publishing.com\/welcome-to-winter\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/winter-publishing.com\/welcome-to-winter\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=664"}],"version-history":[{"count":6,"href":"https:\/\/winter-publishing.com\/welcome-to-winter\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/664\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":670,"href":"https:\/\/winter-publishing.com\/welcome-to-winter\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/664\/revisions\/670"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/winter-publishing.com\/welcome-to-winter\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=664"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/winter-publishing.com\/welcome-to-winter\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=664"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/winter-publishing.com\/welcome-to-winter\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=664"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}